Believe

I don’t believe you have to be better than everybody else. I believe you have to be better than you ever thought you could be…Ken Venturi. In life we’re often encourage to believe in ourselves. However, I believe we need more. In truth, our believing in ourselves should be built on a solid foundation of faith. I believe it’s faith in our Creator that provide us with a humble/reasonable confidence that whatever strength or power we’re lacking our Creator will help us according to his will to be successful or happy. I am holding fast believing M has so many possibilities. These few months M has progressed to the point of graduating kindergarten. I believe faith, patience, persistence and a wonderful support team helped. I believe with continued encouragement he will not let fear or insecurity stop him from always trying his best and showing kindness to others. Also I want him to believe despite his uniqueness rocking autism, he is worthy of love. Yes, I want M to believe in positive thinking so that when life throws him a curve ball he will be resilient. Honestly, I believe like every parent that our children no matter their ability need nurturing in becoming amazing human beings. Last night M took my hands and said “read story story…please”. True reading a story every night is a part of M routine, however this was the first time he said those words to me. M is making three to four word sentences now! That moment was a culmination of years of believing that love, patience, persistence and faith would prevail. I am so proud of M accomplishments each day. M is teaching me to believe in the impossible because all things are possible by means of our Creator!

Simply an autism mom learning

 

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Sound(s)

To wake up to the sound of my son saying ‘Mama, Mama’! It’s the best sound ever…Miranda Kerr. This sentiment, I am sure can be echoed by every parent around the world. I know it sounds so simple, but if you’re a parent of a  child that is rocking autism who is non-verbal or struggling to communicate those words mean the world. True, there are so many beautiful sounds of nature such as rain drops on a tin roof or waves crashing onto land or sweet love birds serenading. I don’t think it can compare to a child’s expression of love. I am honestly enjoying listening to the sweet sound of M. In truth, I am not talking about the crying or screaming during his difficult meltdowns. There is another side of M that many people rarely see. M has a sweet side. Today after school on the ride home, M kept repeating ‘love you’. Yes no matter how many times he says it, it’s still a beautiful sound to me.  I even enjoy the sound of M humming. He has a rhythm/hypnotic sound. I do notice it bothers some people when we’re out that perhaps not familiar with stemming/autism. However, I am happy if M is happy being himself. He is unique and I love him. In my heart I want to give M the awesome sound of self-love. I know this takes patience, love, faith and understanding not to mention my two cups of coffee with hazelnut cream. Everyday I am blessed to be with M, I want him to never give up trying to play the sound of his drums of good manners/values in harmony with our Creator. M is forever teaching me a child laughter and expression of love is the sweetest sound!

Simply an autism mom learning

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Balance

Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving…forward…Albert Einstein. Every decision we make comes with balance or sacrifice. I think we all strive to find a happy balance in our quality of life. I have days as an autism parent feeling overwhelm trying to balance everything. Sometimes even doubting myself or feeling I am at a standstill or worse drowning. Then there are those days I feel like superwoman conquering everything. Maybe every autism or special need parent(s) has days like this too. It’s OK.  Truth, my faith help with inner strength & holding onto a sense of balance in my perspective about life. Perhaps as humans, we all struggle to balance our confidence with our insecurities. I am personally working on balancing social outings with M. I think it’s a balance of fear and overcoming it one experience at a time. For example, it is a balancing act of juggling M’s uniqueness & shopping for groceries. I have to take into consideration time of day and potential surprises not to mentioned M’s disposition at that time. Yes, experiences has taught me without the right balance shopping quickly turns into a full-blown meltdown (fear, anxiety, stress, confusion, sensory overload) by M. There has been times I have left a buggy full of groceries because it was just too much, we needed to leave the store.  Honestly, it’s another story experience about balancing dining out with M. However in our shopping experience, I discovered Caroline grocery shopping cart. It has help M have a much better shopping experience & I am able to shop for at least 30 minutes! The sad news is that these special buggies are only found in select stores such as Wal-Mart, Target & Publix. These stores generally only carry one Caroline grocery shopping cart. So if there is more than one special need parent in the store, it becomes a balance of patience. M is teaching me we all struggle to find our own balance in life but there is beauty & peace in balance.

Simply an autism mom learning

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Impression

It’s not what you do when you walk in the door that matter. It’s what you do when you walk out. That’s when you’ve made a lasting impression…Jim Thome. We have heard the old expression you only get one chance to make a first impression. It could be the way we dress, our unique beauty or the way we carry ourselves with confidence tailoring in humility that makes a huge impression on others long before we open our mouth. True once we speak or act, we have the opportunity to create a unique impression on those around us simply by being ourselves. Positive or negative, we all make an impression establishing who we are or what we represent whether with strangers or people closest to us. We all have the ability to speak wonderful words of encouragement. However in my heart, I believe our action of showing kindness or making a fellow human being feel welcome will leave the deepest and lasting impression. Last week, M had seen a former classmate from his old school. The little boy was happy to see M. He wanted to know why M was not at school anymore. I explained M simply needed to go to another school to better help him be awesome. The little boy thought about what I said and responded by saying “I miss M. He was my friend!” I wanted to cry at the thought this sweet child missed M being in his classroom/school. He asked me if he could hug M. I looked at M who was humming and twirling his hands. I asked M “Hug?” M surprised me by turning sideways for the little boy to hug him. Afterwards, M smiled. There are times people come into our lives that we least expect to make an impression on us, however it is those individuals that sometimes make lasting moments in our lives. Although autism is part of M which does impact his communication and social skills, M still made a lasting impression on another beautiful child/human being. M is teaching me everything we do somebody is watching….so let us reflect our Creator leaving a unique impression.

Simply an autism mom learning

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