Blog

There are no extra pieces in the universe. Everyone is here because he or she has a place to fill, and every piece must fit itself into the big jigsaw puzzle…Deepak Chopra.  The universal symbol for autism spectrum disorder is puzzle pieces.  I love to believe such puzzle pieces represent the beauty of an individual autism spectrum disorder complex brain.  There is a wide range of variables that make each individual with autism unique, maybe that is what make their possibilities limitless.  Perhaps, everyone of us are well crafted puzzle pieces by our Creator.  Hence, our unique experiences in life create shimmers of light and color onto our puzzle piece.  Regardless of our abilities, I am hopeful that each of our puzzle piece fit uniquely and memorable in someone else’s life.  True sometimes M puzzle piece fit nicely, other times his puzzle piece is awkward leading to frustration.   I enjoy seeing M face light up, like when he is around other children.  I can tell he wants to be engaging with them but often times his complex mind struggles.  Often, we try to have other children over to our home.  M get so excited.  He now on his own say “go room, go room…please!”  For a brief time M fit right in, he would be laughing and just being a kid.  Then there are those times he becomes overstimulated or overwhelmed.  In which case he no longer fit in, M need time and space to regulate his emotions.  I understand you can’t force puzzle pieces to fit together in odd ways, you have to consider each piece shape and work out how they will best fit without damaging each piece.  I want M to value/understand his puzzle piece.  To be honest, we all have puzzling ways we’re trying to figure out.  So it’s ok if we have moments of not fitting in, our odd/unique puzzle shape will find places in our vast world puzzle to click in place.  M is teaching me our puzzle piece may not always fit other puzzle pieces, nevertheless, we do have a place in our Creator’s beautiful universal puzzle.

Simply an autism mom thinking

Children have such vibrant minds. They need to play. They need to be creative. They need to imagine. It’s so important for their sense of self-discovery. And it helps them learn problem-solving…Jan Brett.  We’re always learning. In truth, life is not always easy. However, we are gifted with the ability to learn from our experiences. It’s that ability that impact our problem-solving skills. Perhaps for every problem we encounter a seed is planted. How we respond to a problem will either nourish the seed to growth or cause it to be stigment. For example, M has been working on drinking from an adaptive cup that controls the flow of liquid. Yesterday, M was drinking from such cup. However, all of a sudden he accidently dropped the cup. Milk spilled onto the floor. Usually when something like this happen, M have frustration meltdown. Hence, I would try calming him down by reassuring that it’s o.k accidents happen, lets clean it up together. However, M surprised me yesterday. He did not have a meltdown. Instead, he said “OOOH NO! Towel, please.” I responded “Yes M, let’s get the towel to clean up.” I gave M the towel. He placed it over the spilled milk. In a classic momma move, he proceeded to use his foot to move the towel around for clean up. Afterwards, he handed the towel back to me and said “All done.” M connected previous experiences to problem-solve. M is teaching me…we can gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience…thus enabling us to be better at problem-solving. No more crying over spilled milk!

Simply an autism mom learning

You see a child play, and it is so close to seeing an artist paint, for in play a child says things without uttering a word. You can see how he solves his problems. You can also see what’s wrong. Young children, especially, have enormous creativity, and whatever’s in them rise to the surface in free play…Erik Erikson.  I have been an early childhood educator for over eighteen years. My favorite grade to teach was four year-old kindergarten for the state of Alabama. Besides being in the presence of amazing children and their parents, I really loved teaching by means of play. I am a believer in playing with a purpose, which is a major concept in child development (birth-five). It’s by means of play a child learn valuable concepts, that is beneficial for the rest of their lives. For example, a child jumping in a puddle of water after a hard rain teaches cause and effect. The higher a jump equals bigger splashes. Or playing with playdough opens a child mind to endless possibilities like pretend cookies. One of my favorites is watching children develop conversation skills by playing housekeeping/dress-up. Who hasn’t done an imaginary tea party with their dolls/stuffed animals? Or playing with blocks using the skills of an architect to build? Or playing in dirt to discover like a scientist? Honestly, play is a beautiful thing, that every child should be able to experience. There is no one treatment or educational plan that will work for every autism spectrum disorder child. However, I do believe early intervention has improve M possibilities. I love to watch M play. Thanks to early intervention, M is now playing with toys. These last few weeks he has actually been playing with cars on the floor. On top of that, he has been actually mimicking car like sounds! Surprisingly too, M imagination is expanding. He loves drinking straws now. No not to drink with them, he uses them for drum sticks. M plays a beat with his sticks here or there, he will play them everywhere! So if you’re around M, mind your straw. This understanding of play concept for M came about by means of his wonderful therapists using Mr. Potato Head for a year. Additionally, all of  M amazing teachers over the years used play to reach his beautiful mind and heart. M is reminding me that play opens a world of wonderful learning experiences…keep rocking M!

Simply an autism mom learning

The journey is never ending. There’s always gonna be growth, improvement, adversity; you just gotta take it all in and do what’s right, continue to grow, continue to live in the moment…Antonio Brown. Our life is a garden of growth and discovery. We have amazing ability to grow mentally, physically and spiritually. Truth, our growth is without limits. In reality, only we can hinder our growth by not staying activity. It means acknowledging our weakness, while still holding onto perseverance in the face of challenges. I realize at each age level there should be embracing of growth in understanding and confidence. Our family and friends contribute to our garden of growth.  Yes, sometimes growth can be painful or frustrating. However, if we continue to plant kindness, love, hope, patience, joy and peace into our hearts beautiful foliage will abound. It would be the foundation of us being amazing human beings overcoming any setbacks. Last week M turned six. It has been amazing to witness M growth process both physically and mentally. His imagination and confidence is flourishing. M had been working on mastering communication in three or four word sentences for a year. This week in therapy he finally mastered saying “I am five.” In fact he said it over and over and over and over in the car on the way home yesterday! Now, I am praying  for his growth in perspective or understanding that five is gone now but six is here for another year. M is teaching me growth is inevitable so make sure each moment I plant seeds of possibilities.

Simply an autism mom learning

Be true to yourself, help others, make each day a masterpiece, make friendship a fine art, drink deeply from a good book-especially the Bible, build a shelter against a rainy day, give thanks for your blessings, & pray for guidance everyday…John Wooden. I am a standing witness that such thinking goes a long way in making life meaningful. I have witness the power of love, kindness, and being helpful. My grandmother and mom had heart not only in their way of treating people but in their thinking. They believed if you’re unable to help someone, then at least don’t create additional problems for them. In our life there will be moments we can help others to our best capacity. It can be simply helping an individual find comfort by sharing words of hope after a death of a love one or giving up our seat on a bus to an elderly individual. I think that is what love looks like, being helpful to others. It’s seeing a need and being moved to act. As a parent, I find it a great responsibility to teach M the gift of helping others. A while back we transition M room into that of autism hero theme. Yes, M has a superhero cape with a mask with puzzle pieces making the letter M. Everyday, we explain to M that he can make a difference by being willing to help others to his best ability. Afterall, that is the true meaning of being a hero is helping someone to succeed beyond what they thought possible. Yesterday, I was looking for my keys in the car. M surprised me by offering his toy keys to help. He kept repeating the word “Key!”  I was touched by M offering to help me in his own way. Of course, I made M keys work along with my keys once I found them. M is teaching me helping others is a rewarding gift and that gift starts at home!

Simply an autism mom learning