Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others.  If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter what fork you use…Emily Post.  In the foundation of our upbringing lay our understanding of manners.  I remember growing up with my siblings, our mom taught us that if someone was old enough to be your parent, you respectfully used the terms ‘yes sir/mam or no sir/mam.’   Also, our grandma and mom instilled in us that manners included giving your best and considering others before yourself.  I can recall when guest would come to our home, my mom insisted our guest come first in eating.  In truth, that is in harmony with the beautiful divine expressions at 1 Corinthians chapter 13.  I believe this is the basis for good manners.  This goes beyond superficial behavior, it encompass our heart to feel deeply.  Thus, leading our attitude toward kindness and considering others.  This is something that does not cost us money.  Instead, manners does require time and effort to learn.  I don’t feel having good manners mean a individual is passive. On the contrary, I believe manners help us be patience with others and understand consequences of our actions.  The other week M was doing water therapy.  Hence, I decided to get him a little kitty pool.  M was so excited.  I was happy that he actually sat down in the water without having a meltdown.  True, he did not care for the floating toys in the water.  Hence, the toys had to go!  However, M had a blast just splashing the water everywhere with his hands and feet.  He even splashed me but said “Sorry.”  However, I don’t think that sorry was sincere because he kept doing it and laughing afterwards while saying sorry each time.  I was amazed at least he used the word in the right context.  Afterwards while drying him off, M said “thank you, thank you!”  I realized he was showing gratitude for his experience.  I responded with “You’re welcome!”  M is reminding me that manners is still valuable in fostering happiness in a home and eliminating undue frictions with others.

Simply an autism mom thinking

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