The mother-child relationship is paradoxical and, in a sense, tragic. It requires the most intense love on the mother’s side, yet this very love must help the child grow away from the mother, and to become fully independent…Erich Fromm. As I watched M finally resting peacefully after an allergic reaction scare, I reflected on how much M was becoming more independent. Around one something last Saturday morning, I awoke to an odd sound coming from M’s room. We discovered M struggling to breathe and with swollen eyes. It was a parent nightmare. M could not tell us what was wrong. We quickly tried to comfort M while trying to access the situation. However, M refused to be comforted and became more hysterical at my attempt to help him. He kept rubbing his eyes, as if trying to make it better himself. Finally, we just had to grab him and rushed out the house to nearest emergency room hospital. All the while M fought us, not understanding we’re trying to help. As a parent, I know it’s important to teach a child a measure of independents. However, I grew up with my siblings learning and understanding from our parents to carry ourselves in a positive way but never independent from our Creator. Yes, I want M to have ideas, opinions, or principles; a reasonable measure of independent. I want him to understand that independent doesn’t mean you will never need anyone, rather it’s about being driven or having goals in line with our Creator’s will. Hence I find it a balancing act of wanting M to learn from everyday experiences to make better choices, all the while teaching him to pray for help. True, my heart do ache to help M in his time of stress even when he was trying to solve it himself. Eventually, M did received two shots to counteract the swelling and breathing problem. Of course, it did take five of us to help the doctor administer the shots into M. Sadly, we still haven’t determine exactly what trickered M allergic reaction. Hence we’re keeping a close watch, along with trying to teach M it’s ok to get ‘HELP’ when something is wrong…while trying to be independent!
Simply an autism mom learning