Author: rethinkautismmom

Faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase…Martin Luther King Jr.  Faith is an intimate connection we have with our Creator, believing He actually exist and has personal interest in our well-being. Faith can not be inherited nor can it be bought but rather it’s a virtue that we develop over time base on our own unique life experiences that manifest us to believe.  Our faith requires us to face the unknown while trusting our Creator to know what is best and will give us strength. Prayer is our channel of communication with our Creator. A beautiful gift that we should hold dear. Our faith is the illuminating light in the deepest darkest moments of our life.  Thus, faith can shatter the most mountainous of obstacles.  In truth, just as we put faith in our Creator in turn He put faith in us to seek kindness and goodness in others. Of course, to have faith doesn’t mean we will not get frustrated at times. In honesty its having the right attitude that no matter what happens the final outcome rest with our Creator. Hence, although on paper M may not appear to be typical. We have faith that M possibilities is unlimited and not completely define by autism. Our M is gifted with potential strength and ability to become amazing. Tonight M said “Payer, Payer” aka prayer. He bowed his head. Afterward, he said “men” aka amen.  M is teaching me that one of the most important thing I can share with him is having faith …believing beyond the power of our imperfect reason …to see all things are possible with our Creator.

Simply an autism mom learning

The greatest discovery of all time is that a person can change his/her future by merely changing their attitude…Oprah Winfrey. Our life is a journey of amazing discovery. There will be moments when we’re standing on a mountaintop feeling like king/queen of the world but there are those moments we tumble-down into deep valley of disparity. In the mist of our life discovery we may uncover new truths about our inner nature. Perhaps in our moment of conquest we discover our ability to be bold or in our moment of defeat we discover humility. In truth in the mist of a mistake we can make a discovery. Maybe you realize sometimes it’s better to take time to see things from another person perspective instead of assuming misconceptions or assumptions. Hence, in the future help you to avoid unnecessary conflict or stress. The beauty of discovery is that it does not have to be finding something new but rather we start to understand or comprehend what we see differently then what others previously have seen. Thus, discovery is about our thinking and attitude. If our heart and mind is open, we will discover beauty in every human being regardless of their different ability. I think a part of love is the discovery of ourselves in others. The discovery of what we’re or cable of becoming is an amazing process in which we hope encompass love, kindness, happiness and peace. In fact our discovery of our self should help us to see we do not have to fit the mold of what people think we should become. Rather we should take ques from our Creator. Hence, in doing so we save ourselves a lot of headaches/heartaches. This discovery is golden. One of my most amazing discovery was becoming a mom. Children have a natural sense of wonder, we as adults sometimes lose our sense of wonder. Sometimes we become so accustomed to standard norms, we lose focus on a child’s beautiful joy of discovery especially with children on the autism spectrum. M is constantly discovering his abilities with wonderful support from his autism community. Last night M discovered a peek-a-boo story book. He repeated the words and laughed each time the flap was pulled to reveal an animal. His favorite one was the frog. He kept saying “GAIN, GAIN!” aka again. M is teaching me these truths… that discovery is an innate part of being human, it’s OK to be a work in progress as long as we keep trying to figure it out, and that our thinking or outlook influence our discovery in life!

Simply an autism mom learning

Thinking: the talking of the soul with itself…Plato. I believe the true sign of intelligence begin with understanding and accepting our Creator thinking or wisdom. It is our thinking that impact our heart and our action. We’re all created in the Divine image, thus we all have the beautiful ability to think verses been driven by instinct. We have to be careful each day not to let the thinking or opinions of others drown out our inner thinking which should be harmony with our Creator. If we do this, our thinking process would be governed by kindness, love, understanding, patience, thankfulness, happiness, and compassion. In truth these virtues create positive thinking in using our abilities to inspire creativity and motivation in everything we do. Not only that, our thinking process should take into consideration not everyone think or process alike. In fact we have the ability to change at any given point our thinking. Often times this can be a tug of war within our mind, questioning ourselves. Perhaps this is a way to keep us humbled. We should never underestimate our way of thinking about problems, life or the world. In honesty our sense of self-worth in tied up in our thinking…such as memories or expectations are always running through our subconscious like a broken record connecting with our emotions. As a mom of a child on the autism spectrum, I often readjust my thinking as to what is M weaknesses or strengths. I fight hard in my thinking not to be critical of M or myself along with not comparing M or myself to others. I am aware that my thinking affects M. Everyday I tell M “I see you”…repeat “I am smart”. I want M subconscious thinking consist of positive reinforcements of perseverance, creativity, health curiosity, kindness, and love. Unfortunately, no standardized test reflect such progress. M is teaching me the beauty of autism is all about thinking process…if M look confused he really is thinking or processing something or someone…it’s OK thinking process has stemming associate with it….such thinking process has real emotions attach to it and need to be completely process in order for M to have a peaceful mind to move on.

Simply an autism mom learning

Never be elated when someone’s oppressed, never dejected when another one’s blessed…Alexander Pope. Often we’re reminded to count our blessings along with being thankful. Our life consist of moments of sadness or sometimes long patches of struggles. In the mist of all this hopefully we’re blessed with moments of peace and happiness.  In turn we will be thankful and cherish the little things in life-like reading a bedtime story to our child or deep hug from our mom. At the end and beginning of our day, our life should be about love and being thankful for any blessing bestowed upon us by our Creator. If we have a support system that shelter us not only in the good times but also in rough times, we’re truly blessed. In my heart we all need to look in the mirror on a daily basis to remind ourselves how blessed we’re…perhaps to have someone hold our hand when we’re afraid or someone who blessed us with a kind word of encouragement or our child kissing us goodnight. In truth we should also see how beautiful we’re not just physical but also our inner person of the heart. We’re blessed with so many possibilities or experiences in life-like being able to travel all over the world or being able sing beautiful. It’s a blessing to meet individuals who inspire us to become our best even in the mist of difficult times. I believe everyone is blessed to be amazing in their own way. I was blessed with wonderful parents. I am a reflection of both. My family tells me I am blessed with my mom smile and her southern hospitality, I am hoping for her big heart. This evening I played a DVD that was made by a dear friend of my mom after her passing. Yes, I cried. M came and sat next to me. I wanted M to see how blessed we were to have such a beautiful woman touched us with love. M laid his head against my arm and out the blue he said “doo…de”. He had remembered his Nanna nick name for him. M has taught me the importance of being blessed with family and dear friends who love us flaws and all.

Simply an autism mom learning

An arrogant person considers himself perfect. This is the chief harm of arrogance. It interferes with a person’s main task in life…becoming a better  person –Leo Tolstoy. The very heart of our Creator name means ‘He causes to become‘. The Divine has the ability to become whatever to complete something such as our loving Father or Comforter in our time of distress. Also, our Divine has the power to cause something or anything  to become such as the creation of mankind in his glorious image. In truth I imagine all of us becoming the way our Creator want us to be in every aspect of our life, perhaps before opinions overload our minds or heart. I hope we find our true inner self becoming loving, kind, understanding, and giving. Becoming who you are as a human does not have to encompass dreadful fear, hate or bullying. In honesty our becoming the best possible person we can be means unmasking any pretense we may have to allow us to accept truth or reality while still being positive. This level of becoming takes time because it does require us to question our own truths and values. I suspect this would help us from becoming somebody we’re not. The older I get my understanding is that life gives us moments in which we can become more, we can become a better human being  no matter what the circumstances we may face in life. In becoming a better human being we just may become a beacon of light for others…a friend or comforter. I became a mom. Self-revelation help me in becoming who I need to be at this phase of my life… a resilient mom for M rocking the autism spectrum. Life is always changing or unpredictable, hence our becoming the person we need or want to be will also always be under construction. Yesterday, M had an awesome day. He did his physical therapy like a champion. He kept repeating after each task “yeah…did it” while smiling and clapping. I became a cheerleader and proud mom. M is teaching me these truths…M is becoming aware of what he is capable of…I want to inspire M in becoming the best person he can be…becoming M mom has turn my world upside down but I am thankful it is giving me the opportunity in becoming a better human being.

Simply an autism mom learning